Being mindful

My time trial this morning was not quite how I planned it to be. It wasn’t all bad. There were some good things to take back. Consistently working on my starts, or for that matter of fact, consistently working on my overall technique, does reap some improvement. Al talks about consistency down the course, and I seem to be getting better judging from gps and speedcoach data. It’s your next best friend considering there’s no one else to race with. Smoothness of the recovery and the catch was better than previous timed pieces. Surprisingly, my steering and balance was just pretty shitty. Trying not to be too analytical. Boils down to my focus throughout the stroke.

Things have changed throughout the years, and being in the situation I have been in the past 4 years, have certainly taught me to zoom in on what’s important. The people who manage the sport here have absolutely no idea what I had to overcome to get to where I am today. Listening to all the crap about how newbies are trying to stick together and rise to the occasion to make the most of the financially dire situation, to be honest, disgusts me. I have been there, done that and more. I slogged it on my own when everyone else decide to ‘retire’. I have been caught right in the middle of a storm alone. I opened up the gates every single morning before sunrise and would close up when I’m done because there was no one else there. The place was literally ghost town for years. But did I ‘retire’ like all the other quitters? The training had to go on. I have managed to break into new boundaries and covered more ground than any single one of them have tried. Bearing in mind, everyone else in the past have had management support. I was simply given a nice boat, a pair of sculls, and left to fend for myself. I suppose it made me tough. Thanks.

Because of all I have had to go through, if you ask me, everything that I see happening now is just a facade. The YOG last year and The SEA Games in November is a ray of hope that a coach would be hired. It has attracted retirees to make comebacks, newbies to think that rowing is an easy sport, and free loaders who will definitely be given a free ride because there is now pressure to develop the sport. To me, for someone who made the sacrifice and have proved his dedication and commitment, when everyone else chose to quit, it is clear I have been taken for granted. It’s hard to swallow. It will be hard, but I have to put my mindfulness and focus into full force if I want to go on. I can’t wait to leave behind all the crap and head to Mercs.

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